The woman’s husband told her both he and his mom thought it was “rude to just take yourself off to bed” and she should have stayed up until “whatever time” his parents decided to turn in.
That might possibly have been justified had she been turning in for an early night, but according to the post shared to Mumsnet, it was already 3 a.m. by the time she went to bed.
A classic example of the kind of conflict that can occur between spouses and mothers-in-law, the stark reality is that, for many married couples, clashes of this kind are all too common.
According to a study published in the journal Evolutionary Psychological Science, men and women reported experiencing more conflict with their mothers-in-law (44 percent) than they did their own mothers (39 percent).
The researchers behind the study concluded that these disagreements were likely “influenced by genetic conflict” and a parent “unconsciously acts in the interest of their genetic kin” rather than each individual’s best interest.
In the case of the account shared to Mumsnet under the handle Bluemonkey18, it’s unclear as to whether it was the husband’s mother or the husband himself who initially expressed dissatisfaction with his wife’s decision to go to bed.
It’s entirely plausible that, in this scenario, his mom was merely going along with the interests of her “genetic kin” rather than what was best for her daughter-in-law.
Whatever the case, her husband’s reaction was a strong one. According to the post, the couple had been visiting his parents and were up late at around 3 a.m. when his wife decided to go to bed.
He followed her up soon after “saying that it was rude of me to just come to bed” and that his mom “thought so too.” He added that she was “expected to stay up until whatever time they decide to go to bed” and it was “rude to just take yourself off to bed.”
His wife said she found her husband’s demands “strange” - and she wasn’t alone. Those following along with her thread were quick to slam her partner’s actions. “He’s being ridiculous,” one user posting as raindon said with CloseYourEyesAndSee branding their demands “totally unreasonable.”
“If you’d gone up at 9pm I might see their point,” ClumpingBambooIsALie said. “So few adults would go to bed at 9pm that it would look like you prefer spending the hours before bed alone in your room, rather than socializing with them. By 3am, it’s fairly obvious that all you’re going up there to do is sleep.”
Teezletangler, meanwhile, commented: “They are absolutely nuts. They might still have been up at 5 for all you know! And therefore you should have been too? Crazy.” Oopsfellover added: “I don’t think I’d appreciate being ’told off’ by another adult, however they perceived the situation.”
Newsweek was not able to verify the details of the case.
