While a preposition (at, by, for, in, with, etc. ) often comes before whom, this is not always the case, so the key question is to ask, “Who is doing what to whom?” What follows is a quick way to determine which pronoun to use in a particular question.
Who brought the paper inside? Who talked to you today? Who went to dinner? Who ate the cake? Our job is to determine who qualifies.
To whom it may concern: To whom did you talk today? Whom does Sarah love?
Example: A suitable answer to the question, “To [who or whom] did the prize go?” is, “It went to him/her. ” (It is improper to say “It went to he/she. ”) The correct pronoun for the question is whom. Example: A suitable answer to the question, “[Who or Whom] went to the store?” is, “He/She went to the store. ” (It is improper to say “Him/Her went to the store. ”) The correct pronoun for the question who.
“Marie Antoinette and her ladies-in-waiting only invited people to their party [who or whom] they considered to love parties as much as they did. ” The simplified mental version becomes: “whom they considered. ” “Marie Antoinette prevented her mother from knowing [who or whom] she invited to the Petit Trianon. ” The simplified mental version becomes: “[who or whom] she invited. ” Then, you could rearrange it again to say: “she invited whom”, clarifying that she did something to (invited) whom.
